It all caught up to me

Exhaustion that is. I have been riding this wave of feeling okay most of the time. This happens every so often. Wednesday I felt it a bit. I came in the door at 530 after getting my nails done (a post chemo personal preference - after destroying my nails in chemo, I appreciate them much more now) and felt a wave of exhaustion come over me. We did go out to dinner anyway. I figured I would be okay if I just went to bed after that.

Yesterday I was okay in the morning and made it through work, a couple errands and the grocery store. By the time I got home, I was tired and decided I needed to lie down for an hour before making dinner. An hour later I got up and told my husband it was left overs in the microwave for dinner and back to bed for me.

I was exhausted. I was more than exhausted. I slept all night. The alarm went off and I slept for another hour.

I am still tired but I think I can get through today and probably cook dinner.

This is what happens to me. I function normally and do normal non-energetic things. Then all of a sudden I am completely wiped out. Exhausted.

Tomorrow I hope to sleep late. Maybe even get that crucial 12 hours of sleep. Thank you fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis for doing this to me.

Fatigue, needing sleep, being tired

I drag my butt out of bed these days as opposed to jumping out of bed. It is harder and harder to get up in the morning. I have never been a fan of snooze alarms but my husband introduced them into my life when we got married. Apparently now I need a snooze alarm. As I slept through the first four alarms this morning.

There is a difference between fatigue, needing sleep and being tired. To me the differences are:

• Being tired means you need to rest to recover from exertion
• Fatigue means chronically being tired
• Needing sleep means needing sleep

I blame it on fibromyalgia predominantly. It causes fatigue. I get sleep and then I am too fatigued to get out of bed. I get tired also - after going for a walk or to the gym. Sometimes I am too tired to finish my workout. Sometimes I am too fatigued to cook dinner.

I plan my life carefully to avoid being too tired in mid-day and needing a nap.

Hmmm... I think I have another topic of discussion for my upcoming physical.

Elusive sleep

Once again a night of oh so elusive sleep. I can't even blame the cat. Saturday night he insisted on trying to wake me up all night long, alternating with periods of sitting on me that made my back hurt. I was a tad grumpy as a result and ended up cancelling on long scheduled plans with friends to go to a museum which I would have enjoyed.

One of the lovely benefits side effects of fibromyalgia is disturbed sleep. I know I have blogged about this before but I blog in the morning and lack of sleep is often on my mind. Maybe I don't feel as well because I want to go pick up some test results from last week  that I want to read before waiting for doctors to get back to me. A much more efficient system for me.

I also might be cranky about work. I really do like my job. I was hired as a part timer May 2009 and I assumed no benefits. About  a year later I noticed on my pay stub I was acruing paid time off. So I asked and was told yes it was true and I could use it. Then the big boss noticed this last week and I think that is going away. The problem is if you mistakenly gave an employee a benefit, you can't suddenly take it away with out some resentment. So this week I am mad at my job.

I'll get over it I'm sure but in the meantime I'm cranky. And lack of sleep doesn't help.

But its a dark and cold Monday morning. When I say cold, its in the upper teens right now, with a high due of upper 20s. Average is 43. I would prefer 43. Instead of 18 dark cold degrees right now.

See I'm cranky from lack of sleep. And maybe test results. I hope I sleep tonight. I don't want to be cranky all week!

It all caught up to me

Exhaustion that is. I have been riding this wave of feeling okay most of the time. This happens every so often. Wednesday I felt it a bit. I came in the door at 530 after getting my nails done (a post chemo personal preference - after destroying my nails in chemo, I appreciate them much more now) and felt a wave of exhaustion come over me. We did go out to dinner anyway. I figured I would be okay if I just went to bed after that.

Yesterday I was okay in the morning and made it through work, a couple errands and the grocery store. By the time I got home, I was tired and decided I needed to lie down for an hour before making dinner. An hour later I got up and told my husband it was left overs in the microwave for dinner and back to bed for me.

I was exhausted. I was more than exhausted. I slept all night. The alarm went off and I slept for another hour.

I am still tired but I think I can get through today and probably cook dinner.

This is what happens to me. I function normally and do normal non-energetic things. Then all of a sudden I am completely wiped out. Exhausted.

Tomorrow I hope to sleep late. Maybe even get that crucial 12 hours of sleep. Thank you fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis for doing this to me.

Sleep - ever so elusive

A side effect of all my ailments seems to be fatigue. I get tired. I mean I get really tired. Meaning last night I came home from the gym after work and put on my PJs at 530 and convinced let my husband that he should cook dinner because I was so tired.

I was so tired I went to bed at 7pm (seriously). I read for a while and could not fall asleep. I shut off the light about 830. At 945 I was still awake. I think I feel asleep around 11.  I didn't sleep very well.

The alarm went off around 5 when it always does. We ignore it until 530. My husband got up, took a shower, read the paper, brought me coffee, and alternated trying to wake me up. Finally at 608 I woke up. More than half an hour late. But by rushing around, I should be at work on time.

This is an ongoing problem. I have problems getting comfortable so I can sleep. Usually I fall asleep on my back but sometimes it hurts too much. I often take a pain pill before bed because my rheumatologist says it should help with morning pain. I can take a different pill to help me sleep but I don't like to take it every night and last night, for example, it didn't do squat.

Maybe because I had three Hershey nuggets after dinner - do they have caffeine? I don't know but I'll skip them tonight.

Then I am tired which compounds the fatigue. Its an evil vicious cycle. I need a nap. Damn. I'll postpone that until after work.

Elusive sleep

Once again a night of oh so elusive sleep. I can't even blame the cat. Saturday night he insisted on trying to wake me up all night long, alternating with periods of sitting on me that made my back hurt. I was a tad grumpy as a result and ended up cancelling on long scheduled plans with friends to go to a museum which I would have enjoyed.

One of the lovely benefits side effects of fibromyalgia is disturbed sleep. I know I have blogged about this before but I blog in the morning and lack of sleep is often on my mind. Maybe I don't feel as well because I want to go pick up some test results from last week  that I want to read before waiting for doctors to get back to me. A much more efficient system for me.

I also might be cranky about work. I really do like my job. I was hired as a part timer May 2009 and I assumed no benefits. About  a year later I noticed on my pay stub I was acruing paid time off. So I asked and was told yes it was true and I could use it. Then the big boss noticed this last week and I think that is going away. The problem is if you mistakenly gave an employee a benefit, you can't suddenly take it away with out some resentment. So this week I am mad at my job.

I'll get over it I'm sure but in the meantime I'm cranky. And lack of sleep doesn't help.

But its a dark and cold Monday morning. When I say cold, its in the upper teens right now, with a high due of upper 20s. Average is 43. I would prefer 43. Instead of 18 dark cold degrees right now.

See I'm cranky from lack of sleep. And maybe test results. I hope I sleep tonight. I don't want to be cranky all week!

My cat doesn't understand me.

Many people may say 'my spouse doesn't understand me' or 'my family doesn't understand me'. I am an exception - well I always was a rule breaker so I'll always be the exception, never mind all my health crap.

First I need to state the cat was in no way harmed by the writing of this post. I was pestered to nearly to death from my point of view. The vet just said his blood work is very good and he should be good for another 19 years. Yes, 19 years. My husband does understand me pretty darn well (sometimes its scary). Its just the cat.

You say, train the cat. Have you ever tried to train a cat? They are above that. Have you ever tried to train a deaf cat? A deaf, mostly blind cat? A deaf, mostly blind, cat who is 19 and can't smell either? Its not possible.

There are two human beings who live in this house. The other human, my husband, owned the cat before I cam along and he proved he is capable of feeding the cat. Now, the cat insists I be the one to feed him. If I want to sleep in, the cat wants breakfast around 7am - I should feel privileged - in his younger years the preferred dining time was 5 am.

Once my husband heads downstairs, he waits about thirty seconds before he tries to figure out if I am awake. He will come over and look at my face. He will walk across me. He will settle down on top of me.When the cat wants, he sleeps for hours on end. When he wants something he has no problem waking me up.


The problem is my cat doesn't understand me. Here are the issues.

I need sleep in my life. Uninterrupted sleep. Uninterrupted sleep without being poked, prodded, or walked on by the delicate 15 lb pointy paws of the cat.

I have multiple ailments which cause things like fatigue, insomnia, and require sleep for healthy healing. He disagrees. I am supposed to live my life the way he wants.

Right now he is standing on my right shoulder with his front paws and his back paws on the pillows behind me. This is slightly better than when he stands on my left shoulder which has more pain issues. I can stand this for a few minutes before I shove him off.

He likes to sleep on my knees which I keep elevated by a pillow so my back is more relaxed when I sleep so I have less pain. He squishes my knees down making my knees compress and makes my back hurt. So I wake up in pain. Without enough sleep. That makes me cranky.

He just doesn't understand me and will continue to stand on my shoulder until I get up and go feed him.

Fatigue, needing sleep, being tired

I drag my butt out of bed these days as opposed to jumping out of bed. It is harder and harder to get up in the morning. I have never been a fan of snooze alarms but my husband introduced them into my life when we got married. Apparently now I need a snooze alarm. As I slept through the first four alarms this morning.

There is a difference between fatigue, needing sleep and being tired. To me the differences are:

• Being tired means you need to rest to recover from exertion
• Fatigue means chronically being tired
• Needing sleep means needing sleep

I blame it on fibromyalgia predominantly. It causes fatigue. I get sleep and then I am too fatigued to get out of bed. I get tired also - after going for a walk or to the gym. Sometimes I am too tired to finish my workout. Sometimes I am too fatigued to cook dinner.

I plan my life carefully to avoid being too tired in mid-day and needing a nap.

Hmmm... I think I have another topic of discussion for my upcoming physical.